Just when I thought I would never find my true love, you came along. My soul has been searching for you since I came into this world. All my life I have had this emptiness inside, like a part of me was missing and I was complete... and now, I can't imagine my life without you in it...
"Tu sei una stella... la mia stella" - You are a star, my star!
Love you unconditionally... xxx
- Babylove
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Friday, September 28, 2007
Waiting to Exhale..........
As I sit here, waiting for you to come back to me, I cannot stop thinking about how much you mean to me babylove......YES - I do know you love me endlessly and like I told you before.....You wouldn't want anybody else - you wouldn't want to throw what we have, away - cause WE belong together & this was meant to be xxx - Waiting to Exhale.....
Where the hell did you go buy food 'smile' - Come back to me ! I miss you so much - I need you so badly - I love you unconditionally.....I belong to you my love !
Waiting to Exhale.......
My day's are standing still without you ........Why can't we be together now.....now and forever - Please look after yourself.....look after yourself for me - for us ? I cannot see my life without you in it......
Waiting to Exhale.......
Where the hell did you go buy food 'smile' - Come back to me ! I miss you so much - I need you so badly - I love you unconditionally.....I belong to you my love !
Waiting to Exhale.......
My day's are standing still without you ........Why can't we be together now.....now and forever - Please look after yourself.....look after yourself for me - for us ? I cannot see my life without you in it......
Waiting to Exhale.......
This love....
I have for you is from the bottom of my heart. Even from beneath that, if that was possible. I have never loved anyone this much and it surprises me how much my love for you grows every day still. I have so much love for you and I want you to experience it all and I want to experience the love you have for me.
The things you have shared with me will forever be with me and I shall remember every word of it. You have made me believe in love again when I thought I would never find anyone to love me for who I am. I truly love you endlessly. There is so much that I have learned from you and I know there is more I can learn from you. You're so much more than just a BF to me. You're everything.
I don't know what I have done to deserve you but if I did something, I must have done it right. As I have told you a few times, I cannot go a day without you. I can't be without you.
I can tell you this right now, my love, that I will take care of your heart as it is my own. All I ask from is for you take good care of it because I don't think my heart can take anymore heart breaks.
There is no one else I would want to share this love with, just you and only you. There is no one else out there that I want to be with but you. I can't be without you... and I know you know that.
You're mine and I am yours... xxx
- Babylove
The things you have shared with me will forever be with me and I shall remember every word of it. You have made me believe in love again when I thought I would never find anyone to love me for who I am. I truly love you endlessly. There is so much that I have learned from you and I know there is more I can learn from you. You're so much more than just a BF to me. You're everything.
I don't know what I have done to deserve you but if I did something, I must have done it right. As I have told you a few times, I cannot go a day without you. I can't be without you.
I can tell you this right now, my love, that I will take care of your heart as it is my own. All I ask from is for you take good care of it because I don't think my heart can take anymore heart breaks.
There is no one else I would want to share this love with, just you and only you. There is no one else out there that I want to be with but you. I can't be without you... and I know you know that.
You're mine and I am yours... xxx
- Babylove
Monday, September 24, 2007
Daddy's birthday
Yesterday was daddy's birthday. We had a get together the night before. Everyone came except Ezy and family, of course.
Food were delicious! Mummy went crazy and cooked everyone's favourite dishes. I bought some Malay 'kuih' - turned out I bought too much and added to that, El & Jules bought as well, pretty much the same stuff too! So we had a lot to eat but by the time solat Isyak came, everyone was so full to even get up!
So that was on the 22nd Sept. On dad's birthday itself - 23rd Sept. everyone came over again. This time Mas was not around as she has flew off to LA. So there were El & Jules, Ed & kids, me, my parents and Dila. I got home a little after 21:00pm and told Ed to take me to Secret Recipe to get dad a cake since everyone was around.
On the way to Secret Recipe, I was looking at the houses and I saw a naked woman walking around for that split second we passed. I blurted it out and Ed hit the brakes! Gee whizz... now I know how to get my brother's attention. All I have to do is mention I saw a naked woman! I am very sure it works with other men too. *smile*
Bro, if you're reading this - you know I was just kidding. Well, maybe not!
We got home 15 mins later. Dad was still at the mosque so we chit-chatted. Dila has grown so much! She's sooo pretty now and has a body to boot! She used to be this lanky girl and it was good to see her looking healthy and pretty. Dila has also been promoted to 'team leader' in Celebrity Fitness - good news! Apart from that, she is continuing her studies in Montessori - which is good because I wouldn't want her to work with CF for the rest of her life. She has so much more to offer and she deserves so much more. CF pays well but it's just something I don't see anyone working there long term. I worked there before and management kinda sucks. Except Mike and Duke, esp Duke since he was always watching my back (no, not my ass).
Food were delicious! Mummy went crazy and cooked everyone's favourite dishes. I bought some Malay 'kuih' - turned out I bought too much and added to that, El & Jules bought as well, pretty much the same stuff too! So we had a lot to eat but by the time solat Isyak came, everyone was so full to even get up!
So that was on the 22nd Sept. On dad's birthday itself - 23rd Sept. everyone came over again. This time Mas was not around as she has flew off to LA. So there were El & Jules, Ed & kids, me, my parents and Dila. I got home a little after 21:00pm and told Ed to take me to Secret Recipe to get dad a cake since everyone was around.
On the way to Secret Recipe, I was looking at the houses and I saw a naked woman walking around for that split second we passed. I blurted it out and Ed hit the brakes! Gee whizz... now I know how to get my brother's attention. All I have to do is mention I saw a naked woman! I am very sure it works with other men too. *smile*
Bro, if you're reading this - you know I was just kidding. Well, maybe not!
We got home 15 mins later. Dad was still at the mosque so we chit-chatted. Dila has grown so much! She's sooo pretty now and has a body to boot! She used to be this lanky girl and it was good to see her looking healthy and pretty. Dila has also been promoted to 'team leader' in Celebrity Fitness - good news! Apart from that, she is continuing her studies in Montessori - which is good because I wouldn't want her to work with CF for the rest of her life. She has so much more to offer and she deserves so much more. CF pays well but it's just something I don't see anyone working there long term. I worked there before and management kinda sucks. Except Mike and Duke, esp Duke since he was always watching my back (no, not my ass).
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
When I first saw you
When I First Saw You Lyrics
I watched 'Dreamgirls' a few months back and enjoyed the movie very much. It's the typical Hollywood feel-good movie. Very predictable as always but the singing and acting were good. Not to mention the costumes. Oh and shoes!
I particularly like the song above. When I first heard it in the movie, images of my sexy BF came to mind.
He is my dream... A dream come true that I am so blessed with!
Reading his blog below really made my day yesterday and after reading it again today, it still does the same thing to me.
I truly feel like the happiest woman on earth right now.. I tell you, I can't get rid of this smile on my face!!
You're THE one and I hope you'll always remember that! xxx
P/S: You know who 'snugglebums' is... xxxx
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Opposites Attract ? or NOT ?
A few simple examples of opposites:
Tall - Short ; White - Black ; Hot - Cold ; Muslim - Christian & maybe one of the biggest opposites - MAN & WOMEN !
Yes....There is a saying that OPPOSITES ATTRACT, but honestly - do they ? I have always given this one a great deal of thought & I am not at all convinced that this is the situation in relationships especially ? I do agree that opposites will be attracted to one another for short, intense & often very physicly charged moments - maybe because of the excitement these relationships bring into our lives!
BUT......my biggest question about these opposite attractions is - Can opposites live together, be married, raise children together, etc., for the rest of their lives ? Don't we need someone - a soulmate, who is very much like us in many way's, who share the same interest's, loves the same things in general.....don't we need someone like this to be with us in a relationship or marriage ?
I honestly think this is what everybody needs.....It is surely what I need, because I can only see myself living, loving & caring for someone who is in a lot of way's like I am..'smile' And just to make this clear for everybody out there - Opposites like a guy & girl's length, their country of origin(language included), their religion's, their families, etc, etc.....these opposites makes almost no difference to anything in a relationship, except if you allow them to !!!
It's the opposites in our hearts.....the opposites in our thoughts & minds......& the huge differences we find in our souls.!!! THESE opposites make or break most relationship's....
To THE ONE that I love.......To THE ONE I feel the closest to ......To THE ONE I share one mind....one heart.....& ONE SOUL with - I LOVE U xxxxx
Tall - Short ; White - Black ; Hot - Cold ; Muslim - Christian & maybe one of the biggest opposites - MAN & WOMEN !
Yes....There is a saying that OPPOSITES ATTRACT, but honestly - do they ? I have always given this one a great deal of thought & I am not at all convinced that this is the situation in relationships especially ? I do agree that opposites will be attracted to one another for short, intense & often very physicly charged moments - maybe because of the excitement these relationships bring into our lives!
BUT......my biggest question about these opposite attractions is - Can opposites live together, be married, raise children together, etc., for the rest of their lives ? Don't we need someone - a soulmate, who is very much like us in many way's, who share the same interest's, loves the same things in general.....don't we need someone like this to be with us in a relationship or marriage ?
I honestly think this is what everybody needs.....It is surely what I need, because I can only see myself living, loving & caring for someone who is in a lot of way's like I am..'smile' And just to make this clear for everybody out there - Opposites like a guy & girl's length, their country of origin(language included), their religion's, their families, etc, etc.....these opposites makes almost no difference to anything in a relationship, except if you allow them to !!!
It's the opposites in our hearts.....the opposites in our thoughts & minds......& the huge differences we find in our souls.!!! THESE opposites make or break most relationship's....
To THE ONE that I love.......To THE ONE I feel the closest to ......To THE ONE I share one mind....one heart.....& ONE SOUL with - I LOVE U xxxxx
Monday, September 17, 2007
What a LOOOONG week-end !!!
I got to the office about 45 mins ago, after a very loooong week-end.....And it wasn't a long week-end because of a public holiday in there somewhere, but because I missed my Istella like NEVER before & I just wanted to be with her - talk to her - see her - smell her & look in her eyes to see how much she loves me!!
All of the above made this past week-end feel like an eternity !
What helped though, was to hear her voice and read all her sexy sms'e on Saturday & Sunday.....Thank you very much babes !
I spent the first 30 mins of my Monday morning reading her blog entries....her e-mails she sent me, and I loved them all - Love you Istella & I am soooo looking forward to seeing you and chatting to you later tonight! We have so much to talk about.....so, so much....xxx
Oh yes - and who's 'snugglebums' ?? mmmmmmm - are you holding out on me my love?? 'smile'
All of the above made this past week-end feel like an eternity !
What helped though, was to hear her voice and read all her sexy sms'e on Saturday & Sunday.....Thank you very much babes !
I spent the first 30 mins of my Monday morning reading her blog entries....her e-mails she sent me, and I loved them all - Love you Istella & I am soooo looking forward to seeing you and chatting to you later tonight! We have so much to talk about.....so, so much....xxx
Oh yes - and who's 'snugglebums' ?? mmmmmmm - are you holding out on me my love?? 'smile'
Missing you...
It's almost 02:00 and I still wide awake.
Late afternoon, I spoke to my sexy BF. As always, I enjoyed our conversation.
I read through some of our chats for the past 3 days - especially the one where he asked about the ring.
I can't believe how excited I still am.
When I read the whole part - over 4 times too - it actually made my heart beat faster... all 4 times!!
Amazing!
I am missing him so very much right now. I wish I could hit my speed dial and talk to him...
Hope he's missing me just as much...
Late afternoon, I spoke to my sexy BF. As always, I enjoyed our conversation.
I read through some of our chats for the past 3 days - especially the one where he asked about the ring.
I can't believe how excited I still am.
When I read the whole part - over 4 times too - it actually made my heart beat faster... all 4 times!!
Amazing!
I am missing him so very much right now. I wish I could hit my speed dial and talk to him...
Hope he's missing me just as much...
Sunday, September 16, 2007
It's a boring Sunday
I wish I could have just gone to sleep and not wake up to go to work!
I slept pretty good last night but after 'sahur', I couldn't really sleep and when my alarm went off, I didn't want to wake up!! I think I have blogged about sleeping more than actually waking up. I haven't been sleeping very well lately so don't blame me for wanting to sleep more!!
Work has been hectic of late due to PMR and SPM exams coming up. We're preparing for their seminars, PMR - coming weekend and SPM seminar on the 6th of October. I don't think things will slow down anytime soon. I can't wait for Eid Fitri as that would be the only break we have for this 2 months! Yeah, we can't take any leave for the month of September and October.
Come October would be my one year anniversary with my company as a full time staff. Come October 19th, I'll be 27! This year, my birthday falls on the 7th day of Syawal. For the past few years, it fell during Ramadhan. It's a good thing but some of my friends complaint that they won't be able to 'party' due to Ramadhan. Funny thing is that, it's my birthday and they are the ones that complain. I'm pretty much content with just spending it with my family. Of course I would love to spend it with my amazing BF as well but he lives thousands of miles away so spending it with him would be impossible. *smile*
I have about another 4 and half hours to go before I could go 'break' fast with Iza. We won't be able to 'break' fast with our families because by the time we finish work, it would have passed 'breaking' fast time. So today, we both decided to have either Kenny Rogers or Thai Express - I love this Thai restaurant. It serves the best 'Pad Thai'! Very spicy and the taste is just perfect! Okay, I'm definitely going to stop talking about food now!!
My sexy BF just texted me! Hopefully, we will be able to talk soon! Missing him like crazy!!
I slept pretty good last night but after 'sahur', I couldn't really sleep and when my alarm went off, I didn't want to wake up!! I think I have blogged about sleeping more than actually waking up. I haven't been sleeping very well lately so don't blame me for wanting to sleep more!!
Work has been hectic of late due to PMR and SPM exams coming up. We're preparing for their seminars, PMR - coming weekend and SPM seminar on the 6th of October. I don't think things will slow down anytime soon. I can't wait for Eid Fitri as that would be the only break we have for this 2 months! Yeah, we can't take any leave for the month of September and October.
Come October would be my one year anniversary with my company as a full time staff. Come October 19th, I'll be 27! This year, my birthday falls on the 7th day of Syawal. For the past few years, it fell during Ramadhan. It's a good thing but some of my friends complaint that they won't be able to 'party' due to Ramadhan. Funny thing is that, it's my birthday and they are the ones that complain. I'm pretty much content with just spending it with my family. Of course I would love to spend it with my amazing BF as well but he lives thousands of miles away so spending it with him would be impossible. *smile*
I have about another 4 and half hours to go before I could go 'break' fast with Iza. We won't be able to 'break' fast with our families because by the time we finish work, it would have passed 'breaking' fast time. So today, we both decided to have either Kenny Rogers or Thai Express - I love this Thai restaurant. It serves the best 'Pad Thai'! Very spicy and the taste is just perfect! Okay, I'm definitely going to stop talking about food now!!
My sexy BF just texted me! Hopefully, we will be able to talk soon! Missing him like crazy!!
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Lord (Lady, in my case?) of the Ring!
Today would be the third day I'm wearing this ring on my 'ring' finger.
The ring symbolizes the love that we share together, how we feel about one another and it also shows that I am willing to share my feelings for him with everyone around me. I would so very much want everyone to know that I am with someone so amazing. Someone that makes me happy more than ever before!
The ring is platinum with a stone in between two bands. It looks as if two hands holding a stone - my interpretation (as I told my sexy man and others) is two people (obviously me and my BF) holding a heart they share together. Corny, I know but so what? It's my ring!!!! It's simple, really but I love it. It's beautiful to me and what it means that matters the most to me.
I cannot help staring at it from time to time. I love it how my friends notice it on my finger. *smile*. It really is perfect. I love my BF for all of this and so much more.
During one of our conversations, he said I should probably wear one ring on each finger so that people would stay away (something along those lines)... lol - so yeah, that would make me the Lord of the Rings, now wouldn't it??
Right now, he's busy playing golf and I am missing him so much! I hope he'd hurry up and finish the game so we could talk!
*looking at the ring....* Love it, love it, love it!!!!
Hooked on you, snugglebums *smile*
The ring symbolizes the love that we share together, how we feel about one another and it also shows that I am willing to share my feelings for him with everyone around me. I would so very much want everyone to know that I am with someone so amazing. Someone that makes me happy more than ever before!
The ring is platinum with a stone in between two bands. It looks as if two hands holding a stone - my interpretation (as I told my sexy man and others) is two people (obviously me and my BF) holding a heart they share together. Corny, I know but so what? It's my ring!!!! It's simple, really but I love it. It's beautiful to me and what it means that matters the most to me.
I cannot help staring at it from time to time. I love it how my friends notice it on my finger. *smile*. It really is perfect. I love my BF for all of this and so much more.
During one of our conversations, he said I should probably wear one ring on each finger so that people would stay away (something along those lines)... lol - so yeah, that would make me the Lord of the Rings, now wouldn't it??
Right now, he's busy playing golf and I am missing him so much! I hope he'd hurry up and finish the game so we could talk!
*looking at the ring....* Love it, love it, love it!!!!
Hooked on you, snugglebums *smile*
Friday, September 14, 2007
Yes you are! And you're everything... yes, a HUGE responsibility!!
Everything Lyrics
Well, my dear sexy BF... Thought I'd surprise you with this. I hope you like it? Thank you again for taking my headache away *smile*. Thank you for everything... every single thing. Thank you for making me the happiest woman in Malaysia, if not on earth!!! *smile*.
Crazy about you..!!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
I am her BF - I am her BF......Sorry, it just sounds so GOOD !!
Firstly, thank you to my lovely GF for letting me use her blog to write a few of my own thoughts in here, and trusting me too (u taking a huge chance I must add!), with opening up your private space to me - THANK YOU & I LOVE U!!
I think the launch of our song(s) went well....just the start to so many new adventures together, I hope.....No, I know it is! Loved her choices....love the lyrics of both & what she's telling me through both the songs.
I really love reading her thoughts on here - have been doing it for some time now, while she was thinking I'm not interested in them at all. 'smile' I've read them all, or at least the last year's entries.....Yes, that's how long we know each other already! Amazing isn't it...not? Oh, but I think it is.....we've been through so much in this time, that flew past so quickly.....Thank you for every second I could spend with you my love !! Good and bad ( & we only had one or two bad moments!) , has been unforgettable SO FAR - looking forward to our future moments together - I have a feeling we ain't seen nothing yet...'smile'
Oh yes....she wrote the entry just before mine, but seem to have left out the part where she's become her own 'Lord of the Ring'....I wonder why?
You drive me insane....xxx
I think the launch of our song(s) went well....just the start to so many new adventures together, I hope.....No, I know it is! Loved her choices....love the lyrics of both & what she's telling me through both the songs.
I really love reading her thoughts on here - have been doing it for some time now, while she was thinking I'm not interested in them at all. 'smile' I've read them all, or at least the last year's entries.....Yes, that's how long we know each other already! Amazing isn't it...not? Oh, but I think it is.....we've been through so much in this time, that flew past so quickly.....Thank you for every second I could spend with you my love !! Good and bad ( & we only had one or two bad moments!) , has been unforgettable SO FAR - looking forward to our future moments together - I have a feeling we ain't seen nothing yet...'smile'
Oh yes....she wrote the entry just before mine, but seem to have left out the part where she's become her own 'Lord of the Ring'....I wonder why?
You drive me insane....xxx
The Launching of 'Our Songs'
My sexy BF came up with the idea of having a song for 'us'. So he came up with the brilliant idea for each of us to choose one song each. Anyhow, we ended up choosing two songs each - we want to be different so we chose that. Why limit to one, right? *smile*.
I told sexy BF we should launch it on Friday. Well, when two over-excited people get together, you will know that Friday feels like light years away! At least for me, it feels like that. So instead of Friday, we launched it just few minutes earlier. I chose 2 songs which are - 'Lost In Space' by Lighthouse Family and 'Love Song' by 311. I first heard of 'Lost In Space' a few years back on my brother's CD. Fell in love with that song and I knew one day, I would feel just the exact way for someone. I would be lost if he ever got lost *lol*... seriously, if ever he isn't around, I would be lost. 'Love Song' was first heard when I watched '50 First Dates' - I love that song!! It really went well with the movie. I always felt that a song is not just about the tune, it has to have the right lyrics to it and it will make a great song. A great composition. I have a lot more songs in mind that I feel would be perfect for us both but my sexy BF said "JUST ONE" then changed to "JUST TWO"... yeah so I had to live with two. *smile*.
I have been very excited for the past few days. Even more excited yesterday and it still hasn't worn off and I honestly feel the excitement never will die because we both have so much more to give and always coming up with new ideas, don't we, sexy BF? *smile*
I told sexy BF we should launch it on Friday. Well, when two over-excited people get together, you will know that Friday feels like light years away! At least for me, it feels like that. So instead of Friday, we launched it just few minutes earlier. I chose 2 songs which are - 'Lost In Space' by Lighthouse Family and 'Love Song' by 311. I first heard of 'Lost In Space' a few years back on my brother's CD. Fell in love with that song and I knew one day, I would feel just the exact way for someone. I would be lost if he ever got lost *lol*... seriously, if ever he isn't around, I would be lost. 'Love Song' was first heard when I watched '50 First Dates' - I love that song!! It really went well with the movie. I always felt that a song is not just about the tune, it has to have the right lyrics to it and it will make a great song. A great composition. I have a lot more songs in mind that I feel would be perfect for us both but my sexy BF said "JUST ONE" then changed to "JUST TWO"... yeah so I had to live with two. *smile*.
I have been very excited for the past few days. Even more excited yesterday and it still hasn't worn off and I honestly feel the excitement never will die because we both have so much more to give and always coming up with new ideas, don't we, sexy BF? *smile*
You make it feel like it's the First Time Ever !!
Lyrics to My 1st choice song – which is important!!
We're both looking for something
We've been afraid to find
It's easier to be broken
It's easier to hide
Looking at you, holding my breath
For once in my life I'm scared to death
I'm taking a chance letting you inside
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the scars under my skin
Like being in love, she said, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
where I belong with you tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time
The world that I see inside you
Waiting to come to life
Waking me up to dreaming
Reality in your eyes
Looking at you, holding my breath
For once in my life I'm scared to death
[First Time lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]
I'm taking a chance letting you inside
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the scars under my skin
Like being in love, she said, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
where I belong with you tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time
We're crashing
Into the unknown
We're lost in this
But it feels like home
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the scars that's under my skin
Like being in love, she said, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
where I belong with you tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time
Like being in love she said for the first time
Like being in love to feel for the first time
We're both looking for something
We've been afraid to find
It's easier to be broken
It's easier to hide
Looking at you, holding my breath
For once in my life I'm scared to death
I'm taking a chance letting you inside
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the scars under my skin
Like being in love, she said, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
where I belong with you tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time
The world that I see inside you
Waiting to come to life
Waking me up to dreaming
Reality in your eyes
Looking at you, holding my breath
For once in my life I'm scared to death
[First Time lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]
I'm taking a chance letting you inside
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the scars under my skin
Like being in love, she said, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
where I belong with you tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time
We're crashing
Into the unknown
We're lost in this
But it feels like home
I'm feeling alive all over again
As deep as the scars that's under my skin
Like being in love, she said, for the first time
Maybe I'm wrong, I'm feeling right
where I belong with you tonight
Like being in love to feel for the first time
Like being in love she said for the first time
Like being in love to feel for the first time
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Bad morning
I just had the worst morning ever this week! I think the worst morning ever for months! I didn't sleep well - in fact, no sleep at all - when I finally dozed off, the alarm went off. I wanted to come in late to work today but with the guests visiting, that would be impossible. Well, possible if my partner in crime was not on medical leave. So I had to be at work by 11:30am as the guests are coming at 12:00pm.
I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked horrible! Eye-bags and my eyes were puffy. What a sight! Took a shower, got myself ready and went downstairs. Greeted my parents and in return, I was greeted by QN with a big sloppy kiss! Aaahhh.. what a way to start my morning - and I do mean it in a good way! I thought to myself - okay, this is going to be a good morning for me! Yippee! So had coffee and mummy was hovering over me to eat my breakfast but really, I wasn't in the mood for anything except coffee.
As I was putting my things together, I realised that my office keys are not with me. I must have left it in the office. I was right. So with MPIC on medical leave, I was the only one available to open for the day. Huh... how the hell am I gonna get my keys when it's INSIDE the office?? I didn't panic - I rarely panic - so what I did was, I called AGM and arranged to meet him at the HQ to get his spare keys. That was settled. So daddy drove me to the airport, I mean to the HQ (where did the airport come from??) and I got there by 11:30am. From my house to the HQ is 10mins and from the HQ to my academy - 15mins. So I had time. Time was on my side, baby!! Oh yeah!!! So AGM and I exchanged some funnies and left for the academy. I'll get there on time. I just know I will get there in time.
Not!! It is so typical that at the time I am rushing, there was a massive traffic ahead. So to avoid getting into it, daddy decided to take another turn which turned out to be the wrong way. *smile*. I couldn't say anything because daddy is always right - no matter what! So I just sat in the quietly fuming. I can't say enough how pissed off I was. Not at daddy but at myself for not speaking up and told him that he got it the wrong way. Why didn't I? Well, I didn't want to make things worse by arguing with him and I really wasn't in the mood for another misunderstanding or whatever you call it.
We finally reached the academy at 12:10pm. I got out the car and daddy said "I'm sorry I made you late for work" and I know he meant it. So I got in, gave him a hug and told him, I'll be fine.
That would be the end of my horrible start of the day, right? No way. I unlocked the academy, got everything together and who came barging in? My big boss. He just had to tell me how the guests are already here earlier and went home because they waited too long. 10mins is a long wait but come on, it wasn't like I did for fun of being late. It's not something I decide as I wake up in the morning and think - "hey, let's be late today and just screw up the guests. Oooh.. that's a load of fun!!". Fine, I apologised - again after texting him earlier about being slightly late.
Then after the guests left (apparently, they didn't leave - they just went to have lunch at a nearby restaurant), he had asked me to do a notice which I had made a note about it. With all the other things happening and short of staff at that time, I was doing 3 things at once. When he asked for the notice - I was about to do it so I wasn't surprised when I was lectured about not doing things on time. I had lost my patience so I snapped at him. I can't be doing EVERYTHING at one time, you know. I'm so tired, upset, sleepy... I was overwhelmed with all sorts of emotions. He didn't have to add on to my feeling bad enough about being late.
I really hope my evening will turn out for the better. I really can't take it anymore. I'm almost on the verge of breaking down...
I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked horrible! Eye-bags and my eyes were puffy. What a sight! Took a shower, got myself ready and went downstairs. Greeted my parents and in return, I was greeted by QN with a big sloppy kiss! Aaahhh.. what a way to start my morning - and I do mean it in a good way! I thought to myself - okay, this is going to be a good morning for me! Yippee! So had coffee and mummy was hovering over me to eat my breakfast but really, I wasn't in the mood for anything except coffee.
As I was putting my things together, I realised that my office keys are not with me. I must have left it in the office. I was right. So with MPIC on medical leave, I was the only one available to open for the day. Huh... how the hell am I gonna get my keys when it's INSIDE the office?? I didn't panic - I rarely panic - so what I did was, I called AGM and arranged to meet him at the HQ to get his spare keys. That was settled. So daddy drove me to the airport, I mean to the HQ (where did the airport come from??) and I got there by 11:30am. From my house to the HQ is 10mins and from the HQ to my academy - 15mins. So I had time. Time was on my side, baby!! Oh yeah!!! So AGM and I exchanged some funnies and left for the academy. I'll get there on time. I just know I will get there in time.
Not!! It is so typical that at the time I am rushing, there was a massive traffic ahead. So to avoid getting into it, daddy decided to take another turn which turned out to be the wrong way. *smile*. I couldn't say anything because daddy is always right - no matter what! So I just sat in the quietly fuming. I can't say enough how pissed off I was. Not at daddy but at myself for not speaking up and told him that he got it the wrong way. Why didn't I? Well, I didn't want to make things worse by arguing with him and I really wasn't in the mood for another misunderstanding or whatever you call it.
We finally reached the academy at 12:10pm. I got out the car and daddy said "I'm sorry I made you late for work" and I know he meant it. So I got in, gave him a hug and told him, I'll be fine.
That would be the end of my horrible start of the day, right? No way. I unlocked the academy, got everything together and who came barging in? My big boss. He just had to tell me how the guests are already here earlier and went home because they waited too long. 10mins is a long wait but come on, it wasn't like I did for fun of being late. It's not something I decide as I wake up in the morning and think - "hey, let's be late today and just screw up the guests. Oooh.. that's a load of fun!!". Fine, I apologised - again after texting him earlier about being slightly late.
Then after the guests left (apparently, they didn't leave - they just went to have lunch at a nearby restaurant), he had asked me to do a notice which I had made a note about it. With all the other things happening and short of staff at that time, I was doing 3 things at once. When he asked for the notice - I was about to do it so I wasn't surprised when I was lectured about not doing things on time. I had lost my patience so I snapped at him. I can't be doing EVERYTHING at one time, you know. I'm so tired, upset, sleepy... I was overwhelmed with all sorts of emotions. He didn't have to add on to my feeling bad enough about being late.
I really hope my evening will turn out for the better. I really can't take it anymore. I'm almost on the verge of breaking down...
Sunday, August 26, 2007
My thoughts
Times sure have changed. Where commitment and values have evolved as limited priorities. Once upon a time, people really enjoyed each other. It was the simple pleasures that made commitment and value the highest of priorities. Spouses seemed to value each other and respect each other more in yesterday’s society than today.
Today’s world has become so materialistic that it seems that spouses in marriage have now become the object and are treated as such. Focus on growing together seems forgotten. Fast pace and changes in the world have no doubt created a hell of a lot more stress and striving to keep up with it all, thus everyone’s energy is pulled in all directions and becomes lost where it truly matters, in the family.
Sure! I do believe there are marriages that will survive and do make it to “death do us part” and are truly happy. I don’t feel in today’s world there are many. Not from all these posts I have read on a forum I frequent recently. It is very sad to read what these women and even some men are going through in their marriages.
Of all the couples I know, and there are many, it is very disheartening to hear their stories. Some that I know have been together for 25 –30 years and have openly said “it’s been a struggle” and we are not happy and have not been for years. Some have even said “I should have left a long time ago” and many have stated I stayed for the kids or financial reasons. Most have had affairs and some have not! Now they look back and view their life with their spouse as hauntingly frightening as retirement years approach. They dread the days to come of having their spouse as what they referred to as “a piece of the furniture” because they said their feelings have died and cannot be recovered.
No wonder some of my friends, even myself at one point dread the idea of getting married. Even my third brother hated the idea but hey, when he met his wife - he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and I can really see that happening between the two of them. It saddens me that those people I know who are going through a rough time in their marriages don't have what my brothers and some of my relatives have. My ex's parents' marriage was arranged by their families and it turned out well. They are still together after 30 years. My parents married each other for almost 40 years now and they have gone through a lot. They worked through their rough times and that is what I want in my marriage.
I was told that feelings change and so do people. I get that. I really do but there is also people who do not change and that includes their feelings. I don't change easily. My feelings usually stay the same. Only if my man hurt me in ways that I cannot forgive that my feelings for him will change then and even that, it will take almost forever!
I read a lot today on relationships/marriages and such. Now, I have never been the one to talk or discuss certain issues because I dislike it. For me, every time a certain issue is being discussed, it will end up in a big argument or it will lead to a misunderstanding. That is where I am wrong. With discussing matters with your loved one, you make your relationship with your partner a better one. Okay so I didn't exactly learned THAT part today, I actually learned it in Cape Town. *smile*. It's just that, after my trip to CT - I realised (today, in fact) that I have somewhat changed my perceptions on a lot of things. Like I said, I am never the one to discuss but I feel it's important now to let out your feelings or dissatisfatcion on things. I have become more alive now that I have it out in the open. I am more comfortable now talking to my mother after my trip. She's more understanding of the situation and is supportive of me.
Today’s world has become so materialistic that it seems that spouses in marriage have now become the object and are treated as such. Focus on growing together seems forgotten. Fast pace and changes in the world have no doubt created a hell of a lot more stress and striving to keep up with it all, thus everyone’s energy is pulled in all directions and becomes lost where it truly matters, in the family.
Sure! I do believe there are marriages that will survive and do make it to “death do us part” and are truly happy. I don’t feel in today’s world there are many. Not from all these posts I have read on a forum I frequent recently. It is very sad to read what these women and even some men are going through in their marriages.
Of all the couples I know, and there are many, it is very disheartening to hear their stories. Some that I know have been together for 25 –30 years and have openly said “it’s been a struggle” and we are not happy and have not been for years. Some have even said “I should have left a long time ago” and many have stated I stayed for the kids or financial reasons. Most have had affairs and some have not! Now they look back and view their life with their spouse as hauntingly frightening as retirement years approach. They dread the days to come of having their spouse as what they referred to as “a piece of the furniture” because they said their feelings have died and cannot be recovered.
No wonder some of my friends, even myself at one point dread the idea of getting married. Even my third brother hated the idea but hey, when he met his wife - he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and I can really see that happening between the two of them. It saddens me that those people I know who are going through a rough time in their marriages don't have what my brothers and some of my relatives have. My ex's parents' marriage was arranged by their families and it turned out well. They are still together after 30 years. My parents married each other for almost 40 years now and they have gone through a lot. They worked through their rough times and that is what I want in my marriage.
I was told that feelings change and so do people. I get that. I really do but there is also people who do not change and that includes their feelings. I don't change easily. My feelings usually stay the same. Only if my man hurt me in ways that I cannot forgive that my feelings for him will change then and even that, it will take almost forever!
I read a lot today on relationships/marriages and such. Now, I have never been the one to talk or discuss certain issues because I dislike it. For me, every time a certain issue is being discussed, it will end up in a big argument or it will lead to a misunderstanding. That is where I am wrong. With discussing matters with your loved one, you make your relationship with your partner a better one. Okay so I didn't exactly learned THAT part today, I actually learned it in Cape Town. *smile*. It's just that, after my trip to CT - I realised (today, in fact) that I have somewhat changed my perceptions on a lot of things. Like I said, I am never the one to discuss but I feel it's important now to let out your feelings or dissatisfatcion on things. I have become more alive now that I have it out in the open. I am more comfortable now talking to my mother after my trip. She's more understanding of the situation and is supportive of me.
I left my heart in Cape Town
It was a lovely morning when I arrived in Cape Town. Flight was early so instead of arriving at 07:35, I arrived 35mins earlier. I guess I wasn't the only one that was excited about visiting Cape Town!
Mr. Brahm picked me up around 07:40, if I was not mistaken. Went straight to Jabulani Guest House and on my way over, MSHM called. Told me he'd meet me at Jabulani and I was ecstatic! Seriously, I had a big smile on my face. I thought to myself on the way over that I'd greet him with a hug... yeah - good idea...
So when I got to the guest house, got out of the car - I was talking to Mr. Brahm then I heard a familiar deep sexy voice. I froze. Turned around and saw this really gorgeous man standing behind me. Yup - MSHM! Out of reflex, what I did was shook his hand. Oh yeah, you read it right. I bloody shook his hand!!! OMG! I so wanted to die. LOL. Aahh.. what a moment. It's something Amanda Peet would do to Ashton Kutcher kinda movie, you know. But noooo... it happened to me. Geez... way to go, blondie! I told my mother, SILs and Amir that part and they all said "awww... that is sooo 'comel'!!" - yeah yeah... 'comel' when it happens to someone else!
Anyway, what happened after that left me with warm fuzzy feeling. *smile*. Oh yeah, the guest house is lovely! Very homely and comfy. It reminded me of a house we used to live in. It was in Kelana Jaya and the compound was huge with lots of plants, flowers, trees around the block.. the garden was my mother's favourite evening hang out. And morning too. She just loves plants and flowers. Obsessed with them! My father was influenced as well and every evening, when I come out of my room - the first place I look for for them was out at the garden. So in a way, I missed that home. In fact, I missed the whole neighbourhood although people are pretty snobbish (yeah me too - lol) over on that side of my home. Back to the guest house, the owner has a dog. Freaking huge dog. I have seen a huger dog but not up close and personal like Lady. She's huge. And loud. What more could I say about Lady?
The guest house is situated in Durbanville. It's like Bangsar. Only Bangsar has huge shopping malls. Bangsar is actually bigger than Durbanville and way too many snobs around - *smile*. What's in common between those two is the greenery around the town. So full of trees. Durbanville is filled with good looking people. Be it young, old, single, married.. you name it. Every corner, there's a good looking girl or guy. I appreciate all the beauty in life has to offer because I am a typical Libra. I only like the finest things in life. With that said, I guess I like where I was because it is a beautiful place. It's simple but there's just something about that town and I can't quite put a finger to it. Of course the fact that MSHM was nearby helped. *big smile*. The buildings around the area is superb. Old fashioned type of houses and buildings. Classic. That's one of the reasons why I liked that place a lot. I love modern architecture but old classic ones are just so beautiful. So full of life and with them being old, a lot of stories behind it all. That is why I love history (although I failed most of the time - *smile*).
I have a lot more to write but at the moment, it's all private thoughts of mine. I'm dying to put it out here. Sometimes, when you have something in your mind and you write it down, it becomes clearer or more real to you. But then again, this blog is being read by people who know me personally and I really don't care what these people think but some of these people I know, tend to use what I have written in the past against me. In a way, I'm afraid that they might come out and hurt those I really care about. That is why I do not use real names for these people I have written about but with some of my so-called crazy friends I know, they will find a way to get back to me through my loved ones and have this ability to dig up on everything. The last thing I want is to hurt my loved ones.
So I might just edit a few things around here before I write down what I have in mind. Maybe I will just write it down in my personal diary but oh geez.. I just hate writing right now. It's painful. I have not written in a long time and gosh, my handwriting sucks! Okay now I am rambling so I better stop now before I start rambling nonsense!
Mr. Brahm picked me up around 07:40, if I was not mistaken. Went straight to Jabulani Guest House and on my way over, MSHM called. Told me he'd meet me at Jabulani and I was ecstatic! Seriously, I had a big smile on my face. I thought to myself on the way over that I'd greet him with a hug... yeah - good idea...
So when I got to the guest house, got out of the car - I was talking to Mr. Brahm then I heard a familiar deep sexy voice. I froze. Turned around and saw this really gorgeous man standing behind me. Yup - MSHM! Out of reflex, what I did was shook his hand. Oh yeah, you read it right. I bloody shook his hand!!! OMG! I so wanted to die. LOL. Aahh.. what a moment. It's something Amanda Peet would do to Ashton Kutcher kinda movie, you know. But noooo... it happened to me. Geez... way to go, blondie! I told my mother, SILs and Amir that part and they all said "awww... that is sooo 'comel'!!" - yeah yeah... 'comel' when it happens to someone else!
Anyway, what happened after that left me with warm fuzzy feeling. *smile*. Oh yeah, the guest house is lovely! Very homely and comfy. It reminded me of a house we used to live in. It was in Kelana Jaya and the compound was huge with lots of plants, flowers, trees around the block.. the garden was my mother's favourite evening hang out. And morning too. She just loves plants and flowers. Obsessed with them! My father was influenced as well and every evening, when I come out of my room - the first place I look for for them was out at the garden. So in a way, I missed that home. In fact, I missed the whole neighbourhood although people are pretty snobbish (yeah me too - lol) over on that side of my home. Back to the guest house, the owner has a dog. Freaking huge dog. I have seen a huger dog but not up close and personal like Lady. She's huge. And loud. What more could I say about Lady?
The guest house is situated in Durbanville. It's like Bangsar. Only Bangsar has huge shopping malls. Bangsar is actually bigger than Durbanville and way too many snobs around - *smile*. What's in common between those two is the greenery around the town. So full of trees. Durbanville is filled with good looking people. Be it young, old, single, married.. you name it. Every corner, there's a good looking girl or guy. I appreciate all the beauty in life has to offer because I am a typical Libra. I only like the finest things in life. With that said, I guess I like where I was because it is a beautiful place. It's simple but there's just something about that town and I can't quite put a finger to it. Of course the fact that MSHM was nearby helped. *big smile*. The buildings around the area is superb. Old fashioned type of houses and buildings. Classic. That's one of the reasons why I liked that place a lot. I love modern architecture but old classic ones are just so beautiful. So full of life and with them being old, a lot of stories behind it all. That is why I love history (although I failed most of the time - *smile*).
I have a lot more to write but at the moment, it's all private thoughts of mine. I'm dying to put it out here. Sometimes, when you have something in your mind and you write it down, it becomes clearer or more real to you. But then again, this blog is being read by people who know me personally and I really don't care what these people think but some of these people I know, tend to use what I have written in the past against me. In a way, I'm afraid that they might come out and hurt those I really care about. That is why I do not use real names for these people I have written about but with some of my so-called crazy friends I know, they will find a way to get back to me through my loved ones and have this ability to dig up on everything. The last thing I want is to hurt my loved ones.
So I might just edit a few things around here before I write down what I have in mind. Maybe I will just write it down in my personal diary but oh geez.. I just hate writing right now. It's painful. I have not written in a long time and gosh, my handwriting sucks! Okay now I am rambling so I better stop now before I start rambling nonsense!
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Songs that represent certain situation
"In this crazy life.. through this crazy times, it's you.. it's you.. you make me sing, you're every line, you're every word.. you're everything!"
I love that song! Every morning I wake up to that song. Actually, as soon as I open my eyes - I'd get my cell and put the song on. It just brightens my morning even more. It's a song that makes you smile and have a good feeling early in the morning and really, I do have good days when I listen to that song first thing in the morning. It is also because that song just spells out MSHM.
Another song that I can relate to - not so much right now - is 'Pieces Don't Fit Anymore' (it should've come out years ago!) which is also Wafi's favourite song. It's a song about how one feels about a r/ship that is not working out anymore and whatever you do, no matter how hard you try to make things better - it just doesn't or can't get better because the pieces just don't fit anymore.
Oh and another one by James Morrison - 'You Give Me Something' - wow! That song says it all! Wait... that song would be number two, number one would be 'Lost Without You' by Robin Thicke which is pretty old song to me since it came out last year but only showing on TV here recently. That song - it's so good! It makes you want to have a good time with your SO. *wink*
Okay so it's about 20:34 here now and I am counting the seconds till I get my arse off this chair and head home! I'm so sleepy - couldn't sleep well last night due to my 1+ year old niece who kept crying every now and then!
I'll be off from work tomorrow. That is good because I need to get my passport done. I'm getting pretty excited but trying very hard to refrain myself from feeling TOO excited because every time I get too excited about something - it doesn't turn out the way I wanted it to! Typical!
I love that song! Every morning I wake up to that song. Actually, as soon as I open my eyes - I'd get my cell and put the song on. It just brightens my morning even more. It's a song that makes you smile and have a good feeling early in the morning and really, I do have good days when I listen to that song first thing in the morning. It is also because that song just spells out MSHM.
Another song that I can relate to - not so much right now - is 'Pieces Don't Fit Anymore' (it should've come out years ago!) which is also Wafi's favourite song. It's a song about how one feels about a r/ship that is not working out anymore and whatever you do, no matter how hard you try to make things better - it just doesn't or can't get better because the pieces just don't fit anymore.
Oh and another one by James Morrison - 'You Give Me Something' - wow! That song says it all! Wait... that song would be number two, number one would be 'Lost Without You' by Robin Thicke which is pretty old song to me since it came out last year but only showing on TV here recently. That song - it's so good! It makes you want to have a good time with your SO. *wink*
Okay so it's about 20:34 here now and I am counting the seconds till I get my arse off this chair and head home! I'm so sleepy - couldn't sleep well last night due to my 1+ year old niece who kept crying every now and then!
I'll be off from work tomorrow. That is good because I need to get my passport done. I'm getting pretty excited but trying very hard to refrain myself from feeling TOO excited because every time I get too excited about something - it doesn't turn out the way I wanted it to! Typical!
