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It has been a stressful week for me. Work is good but lately, the big boss has been finding faults with us. Everything is not in order or not up to par. Not up to expectation – his, of course. The smallest mistake was turned into a big one. Complaining about it over and over again. At times I feel like giving up. I feel like leaving but I have to think about Jace. Not just Jace, but it’s hard for me to leave, actually. We work so hard to get the amount of students we have now and it’s really not easy considering that we have only been operating for almost 5 months now. Come June, it will be my one year anniversary with my company. What have I learnt for the past 11 months? A lot. I have learnt from the simplest to the hardest situation to deal with.

I have forged a bond with Jace. A great one. We have shared so many ups and downs for the past 5 months. I can’t just leave her to handle everything. It’s hard enough for us now, not having enough staff and when we do get new employees, they fuck us up by leaving only after 3 days of training and believe me, working under us is not difficult. We just don’t understand why we can’t get a decent staff like Shahrul. It’s really stressing us out right now. He’s leaving in June and really, we can’t find anyone as good and reliable as he is. All we need is just 2 reliable staff and we don’t even need full time staff – a part time will do! Gggrrrr…. It is so frustrating!

The only thing that keeps me sane at the moment is the fact that I am in love now. After 3 years of refraining myself from falling for someone for fear of getting hurt, I finally open and let my guards down… well, not entirely but strong enough now to actually love again. I just thought about it, what have I got to lose? If I do get hurt again (not that I want to get hurt but..), wouldn’t it just be another experience? Wouldn’t that make me a stronger person?

All I know right this moment is that he makes me happy. It’s insane. The way we met. It’s a blessing in disguise, he said. I was asked by a close of friend of mine, who was really into him at that time to catch him out and from there on, we ended up chatting more and getting to know more of each other. Things are getting pretty intense for both of us now and it’s scary but exciting at the same time. Like how I can’t wait to see how it will end up between us…. Will it work? Or will we go our separate ways?

He makes me feel good about myself. During one of our conversations, he said I made a difference in his life - yes, I would like to believe that but it's quite impossible for me to do that to him but if he said so then I guess I did then! I call him my sexy hot man because he is and well, physical aside, he has a great personality! So what more could a girl ask for?!